Anger levels have been rising with increasing societal stress such as economic pressures, gas prices, the Iraq war, terrorism threats, and the incessant stream of bad news in the media. Anger management techniques can help minimize the build-up of frustrations and diffuse short tempers. According to anger management experts, the longstanding advice to 'count to 10' when angry is still an effective way to control an initial angry response. Thomas Jefferson recommended counting to a hundred if very angry, to delay an impulsive response.
The 'counting to 10' anger management technique is effective because it provides time to cool off before responding and a distraction from the inciting event. Experts also recommend taking a deep breath between each number to counteract stress and focus attention on the present moment.
"The familiar technique of counting to 10 not only provides the time needed for delay but also offers a distraction from the anger-arousing event," says Dan Johnston, PhD, assistant professor of psychiatry and behavioral science at Mercer University School of Medicine, in a WebMD interview. "While busily counting, we are not mentally adding fuel to the fire of anger by mulling over whatever happened."
According to Dr. Johnston, once our anger is under control, there are three anger management keys to help guide our response.
1. Empathy. By seeing the situation from the other person's point of view we can gain a better understanding of the conflict.
2. Compassion. Being sympathetic helps create an open-minded but assertive response to resolve the conflict.
3. Assertion. An assertive response is a confident, honest expression of our feelings and beliefs that helps create understanding and agreement and does not infringe on the rights of others.
Anger management experts suggest practicing these three keys with trusted friends or family members, before getting angry. In addition, they recommend finding ways to minimize situations that cause stress, such as cutting down your hours watching bad news on TV. This way when stressful situations begin to add up, you can quickly diffuse them.
REFERENCES:
1. Sorgen C. Anger management: counting to 10 and beyond. WebMD, April 6, 2006. http://www.webmd.com/content/article/74/89133.htm
2. Lawrence J. Anger-obics Can Make Anger 'Work Out'. WebMD, February 16, 2004: http://www.webmd.com/content/article/82/97218.htm
3. W. Robert Nay, PhD, Taking Charge of Anger: How to Resolve Conflict, Sustain Relationships, and Express Yourself Without Losing Control, Guilford Publications, 2003.
Posted by Elaine Gavalas on August 7, 2006 01:15 PM
